Doing Things and Not Remembering Them (Automatic Behavior): Next Steps for Women

Have you ever found yourself doing things and not remembering them (automatic behavior)? Maybe you drove somewhere and don't recall parts of the trip. Maybe someone says you had a full conversation, but you barely remember it. Or perhaps you've woken up to discover you moved, spoke, or acted during the night without awareness.

Occasional forgetfulness is common. But repeated episodes of automatic behavior deserve attention—especially if they are new, worsening, or affecting your safety.

This guide explains what may be happening, why it occurs, and what women should do next.

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What Is Automatic Behavior?

Automatic behavior refers to actions performed without conscious awareness or memory afterward. The person may appear awake and functional, but later has little or no recollection of what they did.

Examples include:

• Driving without remembering part of the route
• Sending messages or making calls you don't recall
• Cooking or cleaning and not remembering starting
• Having conversations with little memory afterward
• Walking, talking, or moving during sleep
• Eating during the night without recall

Sometimes this is harmless and related to distraction. Other times, it may signal an underlying medical, neurological, sleep, or mental health issue.

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Why Women May Experience Doing Things and Not Remembering Them

There are several possible causes. Some are temporary. Others require medical evaluation.

1. Stress and Mental Overload

Chronic stress, multitasking, and emotional overload can push the brain into "autopilot."

When you're overwhelmed:

• The brain prioritizes efficiency.
• Routine tasks become automatic.
• Memory formation may be weaker.

Women juggling work, caregiving, relationships, and household responsibilities are particularly vulnerable to cognitive overload.

However, stress-related automatic behavior typically occurs during routine activities—not in unusual or risky situations.

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2. Sleep Deprivation

Poor sleep is one of the most common causes of memory gaps.

When you don't get enough restorative sleep:

• Memory consolidation suffers.
• Attention decreases.
• The brain may "micro-sleep" briefly during the day.

Sleep deprivation can also trigger parasomnias—unusual behaviors during sleep.

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3. REM Sleep Behavior Disorder (RBD)

One specific sleep condition associated with automatic behaviors is Rapid Eye Movement (REM) Sleep Behavior Disorder.

In REM sleep, the body is normally paralyzed while dreaming. In RBD, that paralysis doesn't happen. A person may:

• Act out dreams
• Talk, shout, or move violently
• Get out of bed
• Injure themselves or a partner
• Have no memory of the episode

Although RBD is more common in men over 50, women can develop it—especially later in life.

If you're experiencing nighttime behaviors without memory—like acting out dreams, talking, or moving violently during sleep—you can use Ubie's free AI-powered Rapid Eye Movement (REM) Sleep Behavior Disorder symptom checker to assess your symptoms and determine if you should seek medical evaluation.

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4. Hormonal Changes

Hormonal fluctuations can affect memory and awareness.

Women may notice doing things and not remembering them (automatic behavior) during:

• Perimenopause
• Menopause
• Postpartum
• Thyroid imbalance

Estrogen plays a role in memory processing. When levels shift, concentration and recall may suffer.

Hormonal-related memory lapses are usually mild—but persistent or worsening symptoms should not be dismissed.

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5. Medication Side Effects

Certain medications can cause automatic behaviors, including:

• Sleep medications
• Anti-anxiety drugs
• Sedatives
• Some antidepressants
• Alcohol combined with medications

Some sleep aids, in particular, have been linked to behaviors like:

• Sleep driving
• Sleep eating
• Sleep texting

Often, the person has no memory afterward.

If symptoms started after beginning a medication, speak to a doctor immediately.

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6. Dissociation

Dissociation can occur in response to trauma, chronic stress, or certain mental health conditions.

Signs may include:

• Feeling detached from your surroundings
• Losing track of time
• Finding objects you don't remember moving
• Gaps in memory

Dissociation is the brain's protective response to overwhelming experiences. It is treatable—but should be professionally evaluated.

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7. Seizure Disorders

Some seizures—particularly focal seizures—can cause automatic behaviors.

A person may:

• Stare blankly
• Perform repetitive movements
• Speak nonsensically
• Walk aimlessly
• Have no memory afterward

These episodes are typically brief (seconds to minutes). If you or someone notices these signs, seek medical care promptly.

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8. Early Neurological Conditions

Although less common, persistent automatic behavior and memory gaps can signal neurological disorders.

Warning signs include:

• Rapidly worsening memory
• Personality changes
• Confusion about familiar places
• Difficulty performing routine tasks
• Balance problems

These symptoms require immediate medical evaluation.

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When Is Doing Things and Not Remembering Them Serious?

Occasional forgetfulness is normal. However, you should seek medical attention if:

• Episodes are frequent or increasing
• You put yourself or others at risk
• Others notice behavioral changes
• You wake up injured without explanation
• You experience confusion or disorientation
• You lose large blocks of time
• Symptoms interfere with work or relationships

If anything feels unusual, out of character, or concerning, trust that instinct.

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What You Should Do Next

If you are experiencing doing things and not remembering them (automatic behavior), here are practical next steps:

1. Track Your Symptoms

Keep a simple log:

• Date and time of episode
• What happened
• How long it lasted
• Any triggers (stress, alcohol, lack of sleep)
• How you felt afterward

Patterns often reveal clues.

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2. Improve Sleep Hygiene

Better sleep alone can resolve many mild cases.

• Aim for 7–9 hours nightly
• Keep consistent sleep and wake times
• Avoid alcohol before bed
• Limit screen time at night
• Create a dark, quiet sleep environment

If nighttime behaviors continue, consider evaluation for a sleep disorder.

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3. Review Medications

Ask your doctor:

• Could this medication cause memory gaps?
• Is the dosage appropriate?
• Are there interactions?

Never stop medications abruptly without medical guidance.

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4. Manage Stress

Chronic stress worsens automatic behavior.

Helpful strategies include:

• Regular exercise
• Mindfulness or breathing exercises
• Therapy or counseling
• Reducing multitasking
• Setting realistic expectations

Even small changes can improve cognitive clarity.

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5. Speak to a Doctor

This is critical.

If episodes are recurring, unexplained, or concerning, speak to a doctor. Automatic behaviors can sometimes signal serious conditions, including seizure disorders or neurological disease.

Be clear and specific:

• "I've been doing things and not remembering them."
• "I wake up and find I've moved or spoken with no recall."
• "This is new and not typical for me."

Doctors may recommend:

• Sleep study
• Neurological exam
• Blood work
• Brain imaging
• Mental health evaluation

Early evaluation leads to better outcomes.

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Red Flags That Require Immediate Care

Seek urgent medical attention if:

• You lose consciousness
• You have sudden confusion
• You experience weakness or numbness
• You have severe headaches
• Someone observes seizure-like activity
• You wake up injured with no explanation

Do not delay care in these situations.

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The Bottom Line

Experiencing doing things and not remembering them (automatic behavior) can feel unsettling—but it is not something to ignore.

In many women, causes include:

• Stress
• Sleep deprivation
• Hormonal shifts
• Medication side effects

However, more serious conditions—such as REM Sleep Behavior Disorder, seizures, or neurological disorders—must be ruled out.

Start by tracking symptoms. Improve sleep. Reduce stress. Review medications. And most importantly, speak to a doctor if episodes are persistent, worsening, or affecting safety.

You don't need to panic—but you do need to pay attention.

Your brain and body are sending a signal. Listen to it.